Every year around this time, most of us start to reflect on what our year was like. What we accomplished, what we didn’t accomplish, what we want to achieve in the year to come.
Honestly, as I write this, my mind races with all of the things that I set out to do and maybe didn’t quite figure out, and maybe even a few things that I forgot about until just now! The stress is real and it is not serving us.
My work husband, Tim, has been asking a question lately in the Dragon Lair (MFF’s land of semi-private training) and it is:
What is one thing that you hope to let go of in the New Year?
…and I f*cking love it. I love it because it’s a new perspective on how we can approach the normal end of the year routine… Make goal, start year, get busy, forget goal, remember goal at end of year, freak out and feel like a failure.
Scared to Share?
So I thought I would share my thing with you, in hopes that you will share yours with someone else. “I hope to let go of silently suffering…about anything.”
A few months back, I shared on social media that I have been dealing with amenorrhea (lack of a period). Something that I have been going through for about a year now and had not shared publicly because, well, I was scared of what people would think.
The second that I shared, though, I received an influx of responses from friends, family and even people who I barely knew. Turns out that what I’m going through is common. I’m talking super common! Yet, I did not even know this because no one talks about it.
Sharing it Forward
Now, I’m not saying that you should shout every struggle that you have out to the world and expect it to solve all of your problems. But what was remarkable—and not only for the support aspect it brought me—was the resources and doors that it opened up to me.
From sharing this, a friend recommended that I see an endocrinologist which led me to seek help with a functional medicine doctor which led me to finally start seeing a therapist about some seriously deep rooted shit that I thought I was “healed” from but turns out had only scratched the surface.
Through this incredible team of doctors and therapists, I have been able to take my physical and mental health into my own hands and not feel totally powerless.
Now, I know that I have a long road ahead, as we all do, because that’s life baby!
But I am no longer silently suffering with any of this. I am overwhelmed with support and love and am able to take a little bit of pressure off of my brain that was fighting so hard to keep all of these thoughts to myself.
I have also found that by my sharing, I have been able to educate and inspire other women to take steps in their own reproductive health and learn more about their bodies. How fucking cool!
It’s Not Easy
Now, I am not saying that this is an easy route. To share. For many reasons.
Some think that sharing what’s going on with them is selfish and people don’t care. Some are worried that they will be judged for whatever it is that they might share. Some are worried that once they release the floodgates that there will be no stopping that flood and it will be all-consuming. All totally normal thoughts.
My thought is just this… if there is something in your life that you feel stuck in or overwhelmed by and you haven’t shared this with anyone, take a moment to note if keeping that to yourself has served you at all.
Yes—it has helped you to survive up to this point, but I’m gonna guess that it probably doesn’t feel great to keep it all to yourself, and it probably doesn’t make it easy to move forward and possibly break an unhealthy pattern that you have fallen into.
It Takes a Village
I talk a lot with my nutrition coaching clients about sharing whatever their healthy habits and goals are with their friends, families, even local bartenders if necessary. As a way of holding them accountable, yes, but more importantly as a way of letting the people you love, love and support you.
Our tribe wants to support us, and when we let them in on what’s going on in our lives, we allow them to do that. It is a gift for both sides.
Have you ever had a friend confide in you about something they have been struggling with that you didn’t know about? And you felt sad that you didn’t know (maybe even a bit mad) but only because you wished that they had told you sooner so you could have been there for them and let them know they were not alone?
Or have you ever read a FB post that someone you may not know very well posted that resonated with you so profoundly because you or someone you care about is going through the exact same thing and in that moment you realize that none of us are alone?
To be clear, I’m not talking about the kind of sharing where you post your morning coffee every day or share your thoughts on what other people should do differently with their lives and decisions. (Yes, freedom of speech is a thing and so you do you.)
But don’t you think it could make the world a better place if we all focused on sharing things that help our lives and maybe someone else’s too? Make us all feel more connected?
Just Do It
Saying something out loud to one person or maybe many gives you the opportunity to bring that thing to light and start changing your relationship with it.
Whatever it is has more power over you when it’s stuck inside your brain.
Sharing invites people to care, be a part of your journey and a part of your moving forward into the world with gusto and glee:) It allows people to heal some of their own shit too. To go from surviving to thriving (Yass Ting!).
Happy sharing, friends!
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